Archive for January 7th, 2015

January 7, 2015

Mermaid Puzzle

[Written in about 10 minutes as a silly response to a Twitter conversation with authors Abi Elphinstone and Julia Lee]

Mermaids are so elegant,

With swishy swashy tails,

All shimmering and glimmering

With pretty silver scales.

Yes, mermaids are so beautiful;

They look like works of art.

There’s one thing though I’d love to know:

Oh, how do mermaids fart?


Do they have some special gills

That let them break their wind?

Perhaps the air comes out from where

They’re really quite thin-skinned?

Or are their tails a bit like legs

And sort of come apart?

I long to know the answer so;

Oh, how do mermaids fart?


Do they have some hidden bums

From where big bubbles blow?

Are there underwater caves

Where mermaid gases flow?

I’ve puzzled this for ages

And although I’m rather smart,

I don’t know what goes on below;

Oh, how do mermaids fart?