I’m writing today to say (and I hope that this letter’s effective),
It seems that my sister’s developed a fault – her volume control is defective.
She never just speaks – no, she screeches and shrieks, and my ears have a terrible ache.
And yes, I DO mind her; whoever designed her has made quite a major mistake.
So could you arrange a return or exchange? I’m afraid that there IS no receipt,
But I’m happy to swap her for anything else.
P.S. A TV would be neat.