March 30, 2015

Printer Woes

I’m only a poor little printer,

A poor little printer I am.

And what I’d love most is a small bit of toast,

To eat every time that I jam.

And possibly also some butter,

As jam without fat gets quite sticky.

If not, then I think that I’ll run out of ink,

Because I just love being tricky.

March 27, 2015

Bee

When I bought my bee in a second-hand shop

I couldn’t quite catch what it said.

But I knew it was grizzling and griping and grouching

And clutching its poor sore head.

It was tripping and slipping and rolling around,

Because what it was, you see,

Was a jumble mumble grumble stumble tumble bumble bee.

March 20, 2015

Grown-up Talk

Blibber blabber, blah, blah, money, money, oh?

Jibber jabber, ha ha! chitter, chatter, so?

Yibber yabber, politics, prittle, prattle, oo?

Yap, yap, yak, yak – what a dullaballoo!

 

March 17, 2015

My Name Is…

See this tail? A brush to write

My name upon the inky night.

C – a comfy, cosy, curl.

A – aloof, athletic, awe.

T – the table where I lie

And sleep all day with still-clenched claw.

 

 

March 13, 2015

Blue Moons

The moon is blue tonight,

And up in the warm winter sky

A small herd of pigs is stretching its wings

And learning, at last, to fly.

Fish play ukuleles

From their homes high up in the trees.

And guns grow flowers that bloom for hours

On blue moon nights like these.

 

March 9, 2015

Wrong Way Round

The Little Mermaid got some legs,

According to her wish,

Sadly, though, the spell went wrong;

Her head’s now like a a fish.

March 5, 2015

Getting In Character For World Book Day

Miss, I did dress up, Miss,

Miss, this isn’t rude.

That king’s my favourite character!

What d’you mean, I’m nude?

Miss, I’m wearing clothes, Miss!

What, you still can’t see?

That only goes to show, Miss,

You’re stupid as can be!

March 2, 2015

Dusk

In the owl-light of evening the air is humming;

The night, the night, the night is coming!

Everything still in the sun’s last spark,

The world lies in wait for the galloping dark.

Creatures creep out from their lairs underground.

Eyes blink open. Ears twitch around.

And the pitter and patter of scampering feet

Is in time with the rhyme of the oncoming beat,

As faster and faster the black draws in.

Nearer and nearer; it knows it will win.

It snuffs out the sun, and its head is held high

As it spread out its banner, across the whole sky.

And then comes the moon, conquering, clear.

The night, the night, the night is here.

February 23, 2015

Fruit DNA

‘It’s a hard idea to grapple’, said the elongated apple,

‘And it sometimes makes me crumble in a heap of bleak despair,

But I guess I’m not surprised, as I do appear mis-sized;

Yes, I’ve just been told my parent is apparently a pear’.

 

February 20, 2015

Sicker

An alligator, feeling sick,

Croaked ‘Get me to the doctor, quick!’

He felt a chill, and not much later

Really was an illergator.

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